What I believe

Okay so today I'm going to basically break all my stated rules and post basically about what I believe as a Christian and why. I've discovered that many people who read my blog aren't believers even though the blog is really aimed at people who are. Most of them have been really nice about it, I did get a somewhat hostile comment in response to my last post. I published it anyway and my response is there as well. I will never take hostility personally, especially on the Internet.

I'm posting this because I don't want anyone to be under any illusions. There are some tough pills to swallow in Christianity that many people (sometimes me included!) would rather not discuss. I also realized that I spend a lot of time talking about what I don't believe and there should probably be a good counter.

So to begin:

I have a very mixed world view that I think accounts for my atypical views as a Christian. My parents were both missionaries and my father was a pastor in several churches. We're from Texas, the "buckle of the bible belt". So I was raised in the typical Christian home environment.With a few important differences:

First of all while my dad also comes from a Christian home, my mom doesn't. In fact her family is somewhat broken which was a lot more taboo in the 50s. Mom wasn't raised in a bubble and she didn't lie about the way the world worked even when my sister and I were kids. The second difference is that our family moved to Tanzania (East Africa) when I was eight. Even as a young child my experiences helped me to see the world beyond the US and far beyond the sheltered life of the bible belt.

When I moved back to the US at the age of 14 I was very bitter. I saw Americans and ignorant and greedy and immoral ... in general. At first I became ultra religious, thinking that God would be pleased with me over the "heathens" that existed in "the world". Overtime though I gave up on God. He wasn't changing people, I wasn't going to waste my time. I never stopped believing but I stopped caring even though I continued to go through all the motions.

It took me almost 5 years, but over time I reevaluated everything I believe in. I stopped worrying about what other people were doing. I stopped worrying about what other people believed. I started realizing the Bible isn't about rules, its about relationships. Specifically between man and God.

Christianity is about loving God and being his friend. God isn't taking a tally of the rules we break. In fact he states that the rules aren't even important. Christianity is different from all religions in this aspect, its not about rituals and rules, God isn't some cosmic principal waiting to strike us down for every little infraction. He wants us to come before him, he wants us to love him because we choose to.

So what's the problem? God cannot break his own rules (yes that is a paradox), and one of his rules is that any imperfection before him would be destroyed. God is so perfect that no imperfection can be in his presence. That's bad news for us because we are not perfect. No one is, everyone has cheated, everyone has lied, everyone has gossiped ... you get the idea.

God's rules demand justice for imperfection. Specifically a sacrifice of blood. Before Christ people met this by the sacrificing of animals and of specific rituals and rules. The hardest part to understand is why God sent Christ and why his sacrifice is different. Christians believe that Christ is the son of God but he is also God himself (yes another paradox). So God literally sacrificed himself as a blood sacrifice to set people free of the rituals and the guilt and to approach God in love. As the perfect sacrifice God immediately paid for all of the imperfections throughout the rest of time. He then showed his power by raising from the dead (physically!).

I think a lot of people (Christians included) see the Christian God as an angry child who stomps and threatens to blow everyone up if they don't follow him. I often get asked if I believe that Christianity is the only way to be in the presence of God, and if I believe in hell as a literal place and finally if I believe that people who aren't Christians are going to hell.

The answers to the questions are disturbing when we think of God as an angry God, but what if the truth is somewhat different. Think of it in metaphorical terms. You're drowning in a massive flood, God is the guy that comes along in a boat and throws a rope to you and pulls you out of the water. In that sense everyone is going to hell, some people choose to take the life preserver. God can't force anyone to take it, he doesn't send people to hell, the choice has to be voluntary. Because of this, most Christians (even the annoying ones) genuinely believe they are doing you a favor by telling you this. We have nothing personal to gain by telling you, in fact we're often ridiculed for it (no I won't say persecuted).

I rant and rave because I want Christians to do a better job. Not just say the words but to be an example. Actions are always louder than words.

That's it from me.